“Slow poison”; the equivalent is ARR’s music; it takes a while to sink in your blood, that’s how it is when you are consuming something “new-different”. (music is positive energy)
However, as already said Love is intelligent; Love combined with marriage is “new-different” and here it necessarily need not be positive energy because one doesnt get to know how and how slowly one is getting poisoned to death.
People like Sharada, young, naive, gullible, fresh, plunge on to take the reigns and start running the show, not realising where it is heading. A thought of being an “expert” is what comes to them, however in reality and simple words its called “coping up.” Family is first; on a run to make everything perfect, some things fall apart. In the process you earn accolodes and some at times critical showdowns. Nonetheless, all miss to see something missing. The years turn like pages of a book and all the work sinks into a drain.
It is rightly said, one hates to listen or believe a “fact” that cannnot be digested. That is what happened with Jai and Sharada; a fact that none were ready to accept.
Sharada and Jai, though slow with their career growth; didnt really mind the monies; for they had earned a lot of friends and love around.
Jai stood best for everyone, pampared by parents, polluted by friends, encouraged by Sharada. A sense of pride to have achieved lot of things at a very early age; and there is lot of time to acquire many more in this world.
For Sharada it was “freedom”, unlike what she has been experiencing at grandma’s home, here she had people who encouraged her to pursue education, take up a job, learn riding, pursue activities like singing, dancing and everything that Sharada probably thought would be history.
It was about the present, and when you live in the present there is nothing called “moment of unhappiness”.
A privately made promise between Jai and Sharada proved to be the biggest mistake of their life. When a secret is kept a secret, it is trouble; again the same secret if it is out, it is disastrous. It is communication, whatever one communicates – people want to hear only what they want to hear; it really does not matter what actually is communicated.
“Love making” an integral part of married life did not happen to Jai and Sharada. A chosen decision between them and why? there is no perfect answer for this. There were several excuses, not reasons. And when you get busy with life; all the parameters laid down remains just factors in a piece of paper or a part of one’s memory ruining the journey.
“Guilt” a big word.
Sharada had cooked a delicious dinner, that comprised a vegetable pulao, a side dish kurma, a raitha but she had forgottem to add salt. Thats exactly was her married life. Everything was right but the menu card of a “wife” had a role to play and that “element called sex” was missing.
Borrowing a conversation; somebody had said “never feel guilty of any mistake, its a big word”; according to this, a mistake can be rectified or apologised, however, guilt could not be. And why because “one is not responsible for all the personal actions, sometimes God plays a bigger role”. But this is a far-fetched feeling and a matter of convenience. This is what exactly happens; love directs you to think as well feel. At times love will compell you to feel that you are the culprit; and in the same scale make you realise you are a “victim” as well.
How-much-ever one tries to fulfill and make the “man” happy in love and marriage; if the “man” is unhappy then the entire relationship is screwed. No matter proving or converting as a daughter / sister to in-laws or mere a maid servant - to wash and clean the dirt from clothes and bathrooms for the longest, youngest years; Salt missed in life is losing everything in life.
Sharada and Jai were habituated to each other; it used to be like early morning, afternoon, evening and night chores. They always exchanged beautiful smiles, wonderful jokes, delicious food, colourful clothes. The mouth would not stop, it was always go chatter chatter - talking, hearing and vice versa. Sometimes their conversations of “love-making” had theories – either innovated or discovered. Jai conferred that Sharada is everything for him, and it really didnt matter if they had sex or kids. Sharada conferred that “love making” was not important and passed everyday with guilt, thinking that she could not attract Jai at any count. When she touched Jai, nothing happened to her.
There was no denial, Sharada loved Jai a lot and vice-versa; but why did they not make love to eachother. “Chemistry” is it important?
Biological necessity as in men, does not really happen with women, unless they experience. Here was a case where Sharada had not experienced anything to even talk about it; she would not want in the first place. To avoid all kinds of deliberations, resorting to excuses like “not yet ready to become a mother” started flowing the floor.
Some things made Sharada very vulnerable; pressure from house, questions from friends, not being able to communicate or share. Sharada could not articulate or be in silence. She was a part of a family, there were many responsibilites, at the same time a growing woman.
Four years passed by and none realised that she was growing with them not just horizontally but also mentally. She had thoughts of her own, learnt or heard.
When one talks bad things about a person, ears and eyes are open. The next time any move made by that person will be treated cautiously. Try talking good about people, ears and eyes are trained only to take good things; they will not open for any critical input about that person.
Jai and Sharada’s four long years of fascinating, enduring ride skid; a ride that required a little bit of direction.
Every marriage has problems; every marriage has solutions, excepting that, its always a new problem, leaving no room for right directions.
A long patient wait only to fall apart.
However, as already said Love is intelligent; Love combined with marriage is “new-different” and here it necessarily need not be positive energy because one doesnt get to know how and how slowly one is getting poisoned to death.
People like Sharada, young, naive, gullible, fresh, plunge on to take the reigns and start running the show, not realising where it is heading. A thought of being an “expert” is what comes to them, however in reality and simple words its called “coping up.” Family is first; on a run to make everything perfect, some things fall apart. In the process you earn accolodes and some at times critical showdowns. Nonetheless, all miss to see something missing. The years turn like pages of a book and all the work sinks into a drain.
It is rightly said, one hates to listen or believe a “fact” that cannnot be digested. That is what happened with Jai and Sharada; a fact that none were ready to accept.
Sharada and Jai, though slow with their career growth; didnt really mind the monies; for they had earned a lot of friends and love around.
Jai stood best for everyone, pampared by parents, polluted by friends, encouraged by Sharada. A sense of pride to have achieved lot of things at a very early age; and there is lot of time to acquire many more in this world.
For Sharada it was “freedom”, unlike what she has been experiencing at grandma’s home, here she had people who encouraged her to pursue education, take up a job, learn riding, pursue activities like singing, dancing and everything that Sharada probably thought would be history.
It was about the present, and when you live in the present there is nothing called “moment of unhappiness”.
A privately made promise between Jai and Sharada proved to be the biggest mistake of their life. When a secret is kept a secret, it is trouble; again the same secret if it is out, it is disastrous. It is communication, whatever one communicates – people want to hear only what they want to hear; it really does not matter what actually is communicated.
“Love making” an integral part of married life did not happen to Jai and Sharada. A chosen decision between them and why? there is no perfect answer for this. There were several excuses, not reasons. And when you get busy with life; all the parameters laid down remains just factors in a piece of paper or a part of one’s memory ruining the journey.
“Guilt” a big word.
Sharada had cooked a delicious dinner, that comprised a vegetable pulao, a side dish kurma, a raitha but she had forgottem to add salt. Thats exactly was her married life. Everything was right but the menu card of a “wife” had a role to play and that “element called sex” was missing.
Borrowing a conversation; somebody had said “never feel guilty of any mistake, its a big word”; according to this, a mistake can be rectified or apologised, however, guilt could not be. And why because “one is not responsible for all the personal actions, sometimes God plays a bigger role”. But this is a far-fetched feeling and a matter of convenience. This is what exactly happens; love directs you to think as well feel. At times love will compell you to feel that you are the culprit; and in the same scale make you realise you are a “victim” as well.
How-much-ever one tries to fulfill and make the “man” happy in love and marriage; if the “man” is unhappy then the entire relationship is screwed. No matter proving or converting as a daughter / sister to in-laws or mere a maid servant - to wash and clean the dirt from clothes and bathrooms for the longest, youngest years; Salt missed in life is losing everything in life.
Sharada and Jai were habituated to each other; it used to be like early morning, afternoon, evening and night chores. They always exchanged beautiful smiles, wonderful jokes, delicious food, colourful clothes. The mouth would not stop, it was always go chatter chatter - talking, hearing and vice versa. Sometimes their conversations of “love-making” had theories – either innovated or discovered. Jai conferred that Sharada is everything for him, and it really didnt matter if they had sex or kids. Sharada conferred that “love making” was not important and passed everyday with guilt, thinking that she could not attract Jai at any count. When she touched Jai, nothing happened to her.
There was no denial, Sharada loved Jai a lot and vice-versa; but why did they not make love to eachother. “Chemistry” is it important?
Biological necessity as in men, does not really happen with women, unless they experience. Here was a case where Sharada had not experienced anything to even talk about it; she would not want in the first place. To avoid all kinds of deliberations, resorting to excuses like “not yet ready to become a mother” started flowing the floor.
Some things made Sharada very vulnerable; pressure from house, questions from friends, not being able to communicate or share. Sharada could not articulate or be in silence. She was a part of a family, there were many responsibilites, at the same time a growing woman.
Four years passed by and none realised that she was growing with them not just horizontally but also mentally. She had thoughts of her own, learnt or heard.
When one talks bad things about a person, ears and eyes are open. The next time any move made by that person will be treated cautiously. Try talking good about people, ears and eyes are trained only to take good things; they will not open for any critical input about that person.
Jai and Sharada’s four long years of fascinating, enduring ride skid; a ride that required a little bit of direction.
Every marriage has problems; every marriage has solutions, excepting that, its always a new problem, leaving no room for right directions.
A long patient wait only to fall apart.
It was so moving... i loved it.
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