Incomplete 17 Murdered in Love 10

Present

Churning of butter: as in young days, grandma constantly narrated a story about “how the world will end”. She was confident, it will be during her lifetime. A very strong statement like, “I will die just before the world ends”. Here was a woman who had not gone to school but she had lived with laptops and webcams. If Sharada remembered it well, it was in 5^th grade, grandma churned butter with a wooden stick that had a bottom which looked like rudraksh, she would keep a vessel filled with butter milk in between her feet and rubbed her palms against the stick back and forth.

Sharada had seen the butter floating magnificiently on the top, sometimes it was yellow in colour and sometimes in white. A portion at the bottom would be sunk into water. However, when she had reached 21, it was exactly upside down, most of the butter sunk and a small portion out. According to grandma “butter” was earth and the surrounding - water. This thought could have been the result of hearsay knowledge by men in the house or just gossips. As predicted 2012 might be the end of world ;). Do not know about the world, but what she strongly believed in was coming true.

Grandma’s eyes and lips widened when she set her eyes on Jai and his family. Grandma still continues to believe that it was Sharada’s folly to have lost out on Jai. It is hard to face reality, contrary to what ever people observe, it requires a certain amount of strength to accept “guilt” also it requires a certain level of maturity to keep truth wrapped up. It was upto Jai to come out and say what made him do what he did. But then life is like that, some things just stay unanswered. Unless a story unfolds from the horse’s mouth.

Now the clock ticked 8, Grandma called everyone around her, she asked Sharada to slope closer to her; Grandma took out her hands and rubbed her palms around her face gesturing her love to her. She just whispered, I will talk to God for you. Sharada smiled and a thought chuckled - that grandma was confident that she will go to heaven ;)

For grandma - life was complete except for this one granddaughter Sharada. Grandma felt the gap, she felt her own life was incomplete and she wanted some moksham; some where a feeling that Jai was always in Sharada’s heart and mind. May be she went through a quick flashback and wondering where she could have done corrections; but then she had very little choice. An ideal death would have been to see all her son’s, daughter’s, grand daughter’s, grand son’s, with their families settled.

Grandma kept chanting, so were others. “Narayana, narayana, narayana”

Unlike other houses, there was nothing loud about the news, just little sniff’s and tears in eyes. Some people whispered and the elders discussed about the last rites.

During her college days, Sharada troubled grandma by pressing the door bell hard and call her out loudly, Paattttiiii..... going to such such place - a way to run away....and before grandma could answer.....OOOOOOOOO di......

Sharada whispered “Paati”, It was 8.15 am, a silence for a long and last time.