Mid 2006, sans visiting cards, sans a credible portfolio, a freelance designer in the making, Anirudh joins the race of all those "love struck" individuals going any length to bring home his lady love.
For first timers, Anirudh was an instant attraction came across as a pimpled faced, thin built, casually dressed, fashion conscious, trendy, with unkept curly hairs. He pulled off the "YO" look that certainly passed as a creative brain. But for Sharada, he was a person of short or small conversations, very articulate, with unconventional designs. He impressed her. Anirudh was a delight to work with, Sharada welcomed him board not only professionally but also in her circle of personal friends.
Sharada grew fond of Anirudh, an attachment so quick, she was a good listener and everything about him was getting internalized. A silent acknowledgment or little disturbance in his voice or mind would trickle her mind. Sharada got inspired by his mother, amazed by his love story and his muse Diya - so different - not seen not touched etc. Sharada behaved like his mother, sister, teacher - mentor, guardian, child, sometimes just like a client; only to be reciprocated by Anirudh.
Their favourite pass times were movies, music, long walks on the city streets, sometimes spending time talking, waiting, working, riding, driving, eating out etc. As the friendship endured, there were no secrets between them. Time was joy, disagreements, forgetfulness, mistakes but no regrets. Walking with Anirudh was direction less, he will pull - push - turn around, incline his body on the shoulders, involuntarily move his hands and legs. There was not a static moment. Decisions on dinners used to be indecisive and instant. With Anirudh, plans never materialised, focus was today, now, present. It became important to meet everyday at the office, outside office or atleast an "auto ride" back home before resigning for the day.
And then came a breaking point, the shell broke.
One of those days when Sharada was travelling out of station. As she hurriedly pulled out her hand to stop an auto and turned around to bid him bye, Anirudh bowed forward and kissed Sharada on her forehead, she smiled and the auto rushed. Long away in considerable distance, Sharada felt her heart thumping hard. The feeling lingered longer than said. The next two days for Sharada was disturbing, she tried to close her eyes, drift her mind, but in vain. For Sharada it was a "touch" that seemed very different, it genetically created flurr in her body. Strange but true, feelings change and it betrays.
She could not continue to keep it nor have the guts to say it. She developed different feelings for Anirudh, and she also knew that he was in a relationship. She was betraying her feelings while she continued to be his friend. She was equally betraying him with the same feeling in mind. After ten long years a feeling spurred her mind and she was so scared of it. She contemplated to confront this, and all the time she failed. Anirudh was the same, there was no change in him.
Sharada gave it a shot, a thought forced her to vomit it out than see it getting rotten inside. Anirudh understood her. They had continued conversations, practical reasoning, emotional exchanges and decided to remain as it is. However, it grew a lot tougher for them, because now Sharada was no more playing the dozen roles. They strolled sometimes in silence, sometimes very quarrelsome, sometimes they committed mistakes of holding hands, kissing each other, only to feel guilty.
Anirudh decided to close Sharada; on the other hand Sharada's attempts to remain friends did not work. An abrupt ending, no other option than going back to the earning life. Sharada wished for Anirudh and Diya, and honestly wished for them. An episode only to touch and go in July 2007.
For first timers, Anirudh was an instant attraction came across as a pimpled faced, thin built, casually dressed, fashion conscious, trendy, with unkept curly hairs. He pulled off the "YO" look that certainly passed as a creative brain. But for Sharada, he was a person of short or small conversations, very articulate, with unconventional designs. He impressed her. Anirudh was a delight to work with, Sharada welcomed him board not only professionally but also in her circle of personal friends.
Sharada grew fond of Anirudh, an attachment so quick, she was a good listener and everything about him was getting internalized. A silent acknowledgment or little disturbance in his voice or mind would trickle her mind. Sharada got inspired by his mother, amazed by his love story and his muse Diya - so different - not seen not touched etc. Sharada behaved like his mother, sister, teacher - mentor, guardian, child, sometimes just like a client; only to be reciprocated by Anirudh.
Their favourite pass times were movies, music, long walks on the city streets, sometimes spending time talking, waiting, working, riding, driving, eating out etc. As the friendship endured, there were no secrets between them. Time was joy, disagreements, forgetfulness, mistakes but no regrets. Walking with Anirudh was direction less, he will pull - push - turn around, incline his body on the shoulders, involuntarily move his hands and legs. There was not a static moment. Decisions on dinners used to be indecisive and instant. With Anirudh, plans never materialised, focus was today, now, present. It became important to meet everyday at the office, outside office or atleast an "auto ride" back home before resigning for the day.
And then came a breaking point, the shell broke.
One of those days when Sharada was travelling out of station. As she hurriedly pulled out her hand to stop an auto and turned around to bid him bye, Anirudh bowed forward and kissed Sharada on her forehead, she smiled and the auto rushed. Long away in considerable distance, Sharada felt her heart thumping hard. The feeling lingered longer than said. The next two days for Sharada was disturbing, she tried to close her eyes, drift her mind, but in vain. For Sharada it was a "touch" that seemed very different, it genetically created flurr in her body. Strange but true, feelings change and it betrays.
She could not continue to keep it nor have the guts to say it. She developed different feelings for Anirudh, and she also knew that he was in a relationship. She was betraying her feelings while she continued to be his friend. She was equally betraying him with the same feeling in mind. After ten long years a feeling spurred her mind and she was so scared of it. She contemplated to confront this, and all the time she failed. Anirudh was the same, there was no change in him.
Sharada gave it a shot, a thought forced her to vomit it out than see it getting rotten inside. Anirudh understood her. They had continued conversations, practical reasoning, emotional exchanges and decided to remain as it is. However, it grew a lot tougher for them, because now Sharada was no more playing the dozen roles. They strolled sometimes in silence, sometimes very quarrelsome, sometimes they committed mistakes of holding hands, kissing each other, only to feel guilty.
Anirudh decided to close Sharada; on the other hand Sharada's attempts to remain friends did not work. An abrupt ending, no other option than going back to the earning life. Sharada wished for Anirudh and Diya, and honestly wished for them. An episode only to touch and go in July 2007.
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